4 Things you Need to Know About Dating a Recovering Addict
Dating is a tough game: you put yourself out there, hoping to find your significant other, the person with whom you can spend the rest of your life with. Maintaining a relationship is hard, but there are times it gets even harder. One of those moments is when you are dating a current or former addict.
Dating someone who is or was addicted adds more pressure on a relationship, as you try to cope with a carousel of emotions, most of them related to their addiction. It’s not all grim, but there are things one should know about dating a recovering addict.
There is a third partner in your relationship: drugs
For an addict, drugs are everything, their very reason to live. Even when they quit and start fighting their addiction, drugs will be present in your relationship. There will always be someone else between the two of you, even after you receive treatment from a specialized rehabilitation clinic. More than once you will have to accept that you are on the second place for your partner, after their addiction. Their success in their rehab experience is always on top of everything else and your relationship depends a lot on it. There are also former addicts who realize that their partner is now their rock, their everything and they can hold on to them when things get rough, instead of turning to drugs again. You just have to learn how to cope with your own situation.
Dating often comes with trust issues at one moment, but when you are dating a recovering addict, trust is going to be a sort of tabu in your relationship. Even after they quit, you will feel the urge to check on them, to be sure they are not doing drugs anymore. This is human nature and it has a lot to do with the fact addicts are masters at lying and finding excuses. Questioning your partner is always a double-sided sword, because they will resent you for doing it, especially when they are determined to leave the past behind.
Realistic expectations are part of the game
Dating a recovering addict also comes with some advantages and one of them is their realistic expectations regarding your past. Someone who made poor decisions in their own past is going to understand that everyone can make poor choices and it’s ok, as long as they learn from them and make a resolution not to repeat them. Most addicts won’t judge you for your habits, no matter how weird they might be, which is a great relief.
Therapy is something common
The recovering process is long and most addicts get therapy for a long time, according to Suboxone Treatment Clinic. This means they are open, honest and ready to work hard for what they want from life. Receiving therapy on regular basis can also help them stay grounded, so each time your relationship is going through a difficult moment, they can address the issue with their therapist and solve it.