New York City
Standing Head and Shoulders Above the Rest
Recently, I had interviewed with Brenda Di Bari, a real estate powerhouse and life coach. This was a very interesting and informative conversation as she spoke with me about her newly acquired life coaching skills and how she’s working with friends, family and clients on balancing their lives during these challenging times. Having had the opportunity to live and work overseas and return to NY with that experience along with her real estate and lifestyle management and coaching skills, are just a few of the many reasons this go-getter gets it done!
OR: Can you provide a brief update on where you’re working at today?
BD: I am happily back at home with Halstead after a brief stint with another brokerage. I’m a licensed associate real estate broker and life coach, providing a particular type of service that I call lifestyle consulting. With nearly two decades in the real estate industry as an agent, I’ve learned by helping people through the many complex phases of their real estate goals, the most helpful thing for my clients was the emotional and psychological support through whatever transition had brought them to a real estate sale or purchase in the first place. Through my journey of personal growth, I discovered life coaching. First, as a client and then going on to study and become a coach myself. I am blessed to serve my real estate and coaching clients in a unique way that has been of great value to those I have been lucky enough to work with.
OR: Please provide some background on your training with Life Coaching?
BD: I am a life coach trained through the iPEC organization. iPEC is an organization that is accredited by the International Coaching Federation (ICF) and has some of the most rigorous training standards in the industry. Founded by Bruce Schneider Ph.D. and is based on the principles of Core Energy Coaching. In his own words:
” iPEC is a world-class professional coach training organization dedicated to facilitating, promoting, and training others to become fully conscious beings. We are committed to assisting those seeking answers and direction to find their inner truth and remember who they are. We empower others to create love, joy, and prosperity in their lives and the lives of those they touch.” – Dr. Bruce Schneider – iPEC Founder
OR: What exactly is Life Coaching?
BD: Life Coaching is a profession that is profoundly different from consulting, mentoring, advice, therapy, or counseling. The coaching process addresses specific personal projects, business successes, general conditions and transitions in the client’s own life, relationships or profession by examining what is going on right now, discovering what your obstacles or challenges might be and choosing a course of action to make your life be what you want it to be.
OR: Do you see this as the new trend in the market, and will other real estate pros follow suit?
BD: I feel that for too long now, real estate agents have taken a bad rap as an unnecessary leach on a transaction where they do nothing but collect a commission. The truth is that a successful real estate transaction has many nuances and events that need to be handled with care and skill for the best results for all involved. Technology has evolved and imbued all sectors including real estate; leaving some to question the need for a real estate agent at all. Nonetheless, as people go through these events in their lives on their own (with no agent), they will quickly discover the desire to have had someone on their side, someone with whom to consult on the various items that arise. The service I provide leaves no doubt in my clients’ mind the usefulness of what I do. I believe that other agents will indeed follow suit. I am currently devising a framework to guide other agents to support in providing these services to their clients.
OR: What have you been doing during the COVID-19 quarantine crisis?
BD: During this time of crisis, I have continued working with clients on their real estate transactions using virtual showings and services. It’s incredible how helpful technology is during this time! I have been working intensely in coaching all around me, for my own family, friends, and clients in handling the stresses that are inevitable as our entire world as we knew it has been turned upside down. I am volunteering as a coach for frontline emergency responders, I am offering free Zoom coaching sessions for those who cannot afford this service otherwise, and I am implementing my self-care diligently to stay in a whole and well-centered place.
OR: Do you think working from home will become a new norm for most businesses?
BD: I believe as this pandemic unfolds, and according to science and medical experts, we are going to be living differently with regards to social distancing for some time to come. Through this experience, new realities will take hold. Some will stay and some will go, but I do not think we will exit the other side of this unchanged. We have needed to push the boundaries to keep our businesses going, and many elements will prove helpful going forward.
OR: Can you share tips on how individuals at home can deal with daily stress?
BD: Taking a little bit of time for yourself each day is essential, especially during a particularly hectic time such as this. For me, it has meant being super diligent in executing the things that I know I need to be at my best. I wake up an hour earlier than anyone else in my home so that I can do my morning routine. That routine includes 5-10 minutes of yoga stretches, which I change up but typically will consist of a series of sun salutations; I then spend 10-20 minutes meditating, followed by writing a full page in my journal. In that writing, I always include three things for which I am grateful. Completing this routine sets me up for the positive mindset that helps me thrive. I highly recommend staying on a set wake/sleep cycle. Get up as you would on a workday, brush your teeth, and get dressed! It’s too easy to slip off of this and end up spending day in and day out in your PJs, which can have disastrous effects on our mental well-being.
OR: Do you think more people will suffer from mental health in some capacity?
BD: All of us will certainly experience different and unfamiliar feelings during this time of global crisis. Many who already suffered from anxiety and or depression who will likely have a harder time trying to manage. Even those who do not typically give a thought to their mental health will be experiencing moments of uncertainty. This new reality can breed frustration, boredom, anger, confusion, depression, anxiety, decrease in energy, loneliness, solitude, low on money, low on food, low on prescription medications, not sleeping well, overindulging in alcohol, so many things happening to sabotage our mental well-being. I am grateful to have skills and tools available to me to help those around me and recommend that everyone lean in to support such as family, friends, therapists, coaches. Any source in which you can take comfort is perfect.
OR: What practice do you participate in to keep your mind and body healthy?
BD: I am a firm believer in the power of the mind-body-soul connection. I respect all three and treat them as mindfully as possible. I know that as I serve them well, they will serve me well.
For my mind and soul, the time I spend meditating, visualizing my ideal life goals, doing breathing exercises, journaling, reading, etc. keeps my focus and energy in the right place, elastic, and fluid. I am blessed and grateful for all that I am and all I encounter. This can mean positive things as well as challenges. They all serve to keep me growing and thriving. Please don’t misunderstand me to say I am some Zen guru; I am not! But what I am is a human being, doing my best, forgiving my shortcomings, and learning to do better. For my body, I practice yoga, run, play tennis (when not on lockdown), ride horses, go for long walks, and eat healthful foods.
OR: Do you have your family members practice these type of mental health practices?
BD: I do spend the right amount of energy and time counseling and guiding my loved ones. At the end of the day, though, we are all on our journey and have our timing. I do not force my ideas on them, but I do share and find them interested and coming to things as they feel. I lead by example and put great nourishing food on the table. The rest is up to them.
OR: What do you envision in the coming months?
BD: I believe, based on what the experts are saying, that some level of this new norm; being social distancing and limitations on group events, workplaces, etc. will be a factor for many months to come. I know, however, that we humans are resilient and do not lack ingenuity. I firmly believe that we will adapt and invent ways that improve our lives over previous levels. We are remarkable and gifted!
OR: How can people connect with you for your zoom services?
BD: People can reach out to me via email at firstname.lastname@example.org. We will schedule a few minutes to chat via telephone to see if coaching can be of help to you.
OR: Thank you for time and we look forward to speaking with you again soon.
BD: It is always a pleasure!