Learning To Love Yourself

We all have strengths and weaknesses. The trouble is that, often, we get bogged down by the negatives and this prevents us from celebrating the positives. It’s not always easy to learn to love yourself, but there are steps you can take to make this challenge less daunting. 

Get to know yourself

If you were asked to describe yourself in a few words, what would you say? Now, compare the words you used with those put forward by your relatives, best friends, or your partner. Have you hit the nail on the head, or do you view yourself very differently to those who love you most? Many of us have a skewed perception of ourselves, which is driven by the fact that we focus on our flaws. People around you might notice these traits that you deem weaknesses, but they will either play a very small part in their overall impression of you, or they might actually contribute to what makes them think that you are special or unique. If there’s a chasm between your responses and those of others, it’s useful to get to know yourself a little better. Talk to people about how they feel about you and take this free Enneagram test to learn about yourself. You might be surprised by what you find out. The results of personality tests can help you to understand why you behave in certain ways and to figure out how you can make changes or adapt your way of thinking to practice self-care and self-improvement. 

Stop comparing yourself to others

This is easier said than done, but if you can learn to stop comparing yourself to others, you will reap the rewards. In reality, there are always people ahead of us and those behind us, no matter whether you’re worrying about your career, your body weight, your relationship status or the length of your legs. Make peace with the fact that it’s not possible to lead every race. Sometimes, it’s perfectly acceptable to be trailing. You can be competitive without letting it hamper your enjoyment of life or impact your self-confidence. We are, by nature, competitive creatures, but often, you have to come to terms with the fact that winning isn’t everything. There’s no point in being the richest or the most beautiful if you don’t feel beautiful or the balance of your account doesn’t make you happy. 

Give yourself a break

It is incredibly beneficial to try and grow and develop and become a better version of yourself, but there is also a lot to be said for giving yourself a break. Work towards career goals, be a good friend, parent or partner and take care of your health, but don’t beat yourself up if you don’t get your dream job the first time around or you can’t make every single parent-child after-school activity. Most of us are a lot harder on ourselves than we are on others. Being kinder to yourself can help to lower stress levels and boost confidence and wellbeing.

It’s not easy to accept yourself warts and all, but the truth is that nobody is perfect.