How to Agree on a New Home When a Couple Doesn’t See Eye-to-Eye
It is hard to find a new home when you and your partner don’t agree on everything. One person wants the house in the suburbs, while the other wants it downtown with close access to public transportation. You want one thing, and they want another. This can be really frustrating for both parties involved. This blog post will explore how couples can agree on where their next home should be built even when they don’t see it the way the other partner sees it.
1. Make a list of the strengths and weaknesses of each option
If you want to find common ground, both people must be heard. Whenever we get frustrated because we think our partner isn’t listening to us, they probably feel the same way. When discussing your options for a new home, you take notes about what is most important to that person. For example, you might start your list with “barn door handles,” and they might write down “affordable price.” Try to list as many things as possible to get a complete understanding of what is important to them.
2. Discuss the options
Now it’s time for both of you to share your lists and discuss each option. Remember to keep an open mind and listen to what the other person has to say! Don’t try to find loopholes in their list, but rather understand what is important to them. When you hear it from your partner, it might make more sense than what you initially thought. You might realize that there are benefits to their list and yours, such as having a quick commute for yourself and an affordable price for them. This is why it’s important to create an open dialogue and explain your list to one another.
3. Create a new set of options
After discussing the pros and cons of each option, take some time to think about what else you would like in a new home. When you make your lists, try to think about what is most important for both of you. If one person’s list has more items than the other, try not to feel too much pressure to match them exactly. What matters is that both lists are reasonable and attainable. List out anything that comes to mind, even if you aren’t sure it’s possible.
4. Use a decision grid to narrow it down
After creating a list of important options for both people, how do you decide which one is the best? Getting married doesn’t mean that both people always agree with each other. You might be in a situation where you really want something, but they don’t share your enthusiasm.
5. Do what you can to make it work
After deciding on an option for your new home, try as much as possible to make it work. One of you might not want to take public transportation every day, and the other wants walking distance access to a bus station. In this case, you might have to move further from the city center so that both people are happy with their commute.
6. Change your mindset
As humans, we tend to think of things as “my way” or “your way.” In reality, it is much more likely that a third option works for both people. The problem is that we are looking for the third option without making it clear to our partner or ourselves what exactly works for us. You might think, “I want to live downtown,” and they might think “I don’t care where I live as long as it’s affordable.” These two sentences could mean very different things depending on the person saying them. Sometimes, especially in a relationship, it’s all about compromise.
Living in the same home is an important part of any romantic relationship. Even though you might not always see eye to eye, it’s important to respect one another and remember that you love each other very much. List out what matters most to each person when looking for a new place to live. This way you will discover that there are many options available that make both people happy.
Remember to always come up with a third option if the two proposed initially don’t work for you. If one of you is extremely opposed to something, there is probably a way to easily fix your concerns. In any case, try your best to get along and enjoy this exciting new phase of your life together!