Imagine a young woman with a gift for the performing arts, raised in a traditional Jewish home in Maryland and feeling a profound calling to pursue rabbinical studies. Social The Lifestyle Magazine is honored to interview Rabbi Rebecca Keren Jablonski, known on Instagram as @myhotrabbi. In this interview, she shares her journey of embracing her religious calling, discusses her work with Building Together: Building Relationships between Palestinians and Israelis, and reflects on her family life and what it means to be a rabbi in this era. Additionally, Rabbi Jablonski explores how her training as an actor and performer at NYU’s Tisch School of the Arts has played a pivotal role in her journey. She is also an accomplished author, with her memoir, Confessions of a Female Rabbi: Relevant Religion in an On-Demand World. Did you know Rabbi Rebecca Keren Jablonski has even hosted a podcast, Shalom In Your Phone (how cool is that)?
Meghan Forte: Can you share a bit about your journey to becoming a rabbi, particularly your personal path through both Mesifta Adas Wolkowisk rabbinical seminary and NYU’s Tisch School of the Arts?
Rabbi Rebecca Keren Jablonski: It’s hard to sum up how an observant Jewish girl who used to dream of becoming a performer became a rabbi in just a few sentences. In confession III of my memoir, Confessions of a Female Rabbi: Relevant Religion in an On-Demand World,I tell the full story – but here are the cliff notes.
I grew up in the Maryland suburbs of Washington, DC. Right after my own bat mitzvah, I started working in Jewish education and prayer instruction. I taught and prepared children for their bar and bat mitzvahs (teaching Hebrew and the complex cantillation system for Jewish scripture), but never thought that I would become a rabbi. I had no women Rabbis to look up to, and I thought that role could only be held by men. As a young adult, I was more interested in becoming a performer than a member of clergy. While studying drama at NYU’s Tisch School of the Arts I met the award-winning, groundbreaking, and prolific Broadway composer and director, Elizabeth Swados. Swados cast me as the lead of a musical and we began a long relationship working on plays and literary works, often with Jewish content. In my early twenties I still worked for several synagogues and families as a Hebrew teacher, b’nai mitzvah tutor, or lay leader of services. With Swados’s guidance, I eventually began to understand I could let go of some of my more traditional beliefs. I stepped into my calling. I began researching rabbinical seminaries during the last few weeks of Swados’ life, which was cut short by cancer. I asked the advice of many rabbis I had previously worked with and understood that Mesifta Adas Wolkowisk’s program, based in New York, worked best for me.
Meghan Forte: What inspired you to create an “on-demand one-woman synagogue,” and how do you see this model reshaping the role of clergy in today’s world?
Rabbi Rebecca Keren Jablonski: The need for on-demand facilitators of religion is what helped me shape my rabbinate as a non-institutional rabbi. While I’m the product of Jewish schooling and synagogue membership, in my early years of teaching in New York, I met many families who were what I call “de-shuling,” leaving their synagogues because of a handful of reasons. I found that the main causes for leaving a shul (that’s Yiddish for synagogue and school) were time, money, irrelevance, or something traumatic that happened to repel them from holding membership. The COVID-19 Pandemic exacerbated all of this, as for nearly a year, places of worship closed their physical doors to members.
To live in New York City you have to be extraordinary, yet temples often cater to a common denominator. Some synagogues don’t have a ton of flexibility because they operate with boards, policies, and specific religious moment requirements. What if your family didn’t fit the classic mold? Maybe a child had a learning challenge or disability that made synagogue Hebrew school not an option. Maybe a family spent weekends in another city or state. Maybe a family was undergoing a divorce or one parent wasn’t of the Jewish faith and therefore felt unwelcome in a synagogue. I became increasingly aware of the statistic that Jewish American enrollment in Hebrew school was down by nearly 50% from the years 2006-2020. So, I was interested in those who decided that while Hebrew school didn’t work for them, they still wanted to be Jewish and mark their lifecycle moments in a Jewish way. I never tell any family to leave their home-base institution. But for those who have left or are leaving and still desire to have Jewish experiences, I can keep them involved.
Meghan Forte: You’ve officiated many life cycle events, from weddings to baby namings. Is there a particular moment or ceremony that has profoundly impacted you?
Rabbi Rebecca Keren Jablonski: One ceremony that I only briefly mention in my memoir, Confessions of a Female Rabbi, was with a young man who had profound physical and developmental disabilities. For the sake of this story, let’s call him Steve. I was never given an exact diagnosis by Steve’s parents and I never heard from any of his nurses as to why this boy needed 24/7 aid and care. Steve struggled with basic motor skills and did not speak clearly. His maturity level at times was that of a little boy and other times way past his years. He went to a school for disabled children. Steve couldn’t fully express himself with words but could sing along to any song on his iPad. When I taught for the family and led the bat mitzvah for his older sister, Steve’s parents noticed how their son enjoyed the service. Steve expressed to his parents he wanted to have a prayer service when he turned 13. I was unsure that Steve would be able to participate in this tradition, as he would have to sound out complicated words in Hebrew. But he longed to celebrate this milestone and longed to learn more prayers. I began teaching him aurally, so he could learn prayers and songs for a modified bar mitzvah service. Each week we went through the prayers he already knew and tried to add one more. We always checked in on what Jewish holiday was approaching or read a story from the Jewish bible. Lessons were challenging for various reasons – we sat on the floor and the boy was surrounded by distracting toys and dolls that he would take breaks to show me. His attention was hard to hold; sometimes he just rolled around on the floor; sometimes he insisted on singing a single prayer 5 times instead of moving on to a new one. After only 6 months of training, from his wheelchair, Steve and I led his bar mitzvah service together on a beautifully decorated bima (a religious stage). There was not a dry eye in his congregation of family and friends. People were amazed to see this child so happy and able to express himself and his love of his religion through song– remember he could barely express his basic needs. It was all so moving. In the Jewish community, parents beam with pride after their child has a coming-of-age ceremony, like a bar mitzvah. Whereas most thought Steve would never be able to participate in this tradition, I was able to provide him and his parents joy and pride in his accomplishments. He had a wonderful time at his celebration as well. For the next year, we had sessions every Saturday afternoon. Every week, we would re-do his entire bar mitzvah ceremony, and learn a new bible story or celebrate holidays together. I continued my relationship with this family and I trained the youngest brother, who became a Bar Mitzvah in 2023. My work with this family spanned 7 years, and I served the family on happy and tragic occasions. Working one-on-one, in the boutique way that I do, was the reason I could provide this family with such incredible religious experiences.
Meghan Forte: As someone who works with synagogues and families globally, how do you navigate and blend diverse Jewish traditions and customs from different communities?
Rabbi Rebecca Keren Jablonski: Jews are not a monolith: we come from many regions of the world and hold different practices if we are European, Spanish or from Eastern places of origin. Sometimes, when working with a family that has a different religious or ethnic background from me (traditional Ashkenazi), I have to research melodies and rituals within their group’s practice. Often, however, I’ll meet a family with only one parent, grandparent or member that has a unique background. I tell people all the time that every family is an intermarriage of some kind. For example, I’m married to a Jewish man who is from Australia but his parents were raised in Eastern Europe. My parents also came from different backgrounds (my father was from an observant background and my mother was secular and had Israeli citizenship). Many families have an interesting makeup: I have one student with a Pakistani/non-Jewish parent. I have another student whose mother was Mexican and Catholic. I serve people who have a parent who has converted but their grandparents are not Jewish. Being a clergy member in the modern world demands that I am welcoming and flexible for all of the members of our broader communities. Because I craft individual services for each family, each service can have elements that reflect their family’s unique makeup. For some, it may be prayers in another language besides English or Hebrew. For some, it means additional readings to make non-Jewish guests comfortable. For many with family members who are not Jewish, the family desires all of the Jewish traditional customs with adjusted explanations before each prayer.
Meghan Forte: Your involvement in Building Together: Building Relationships between Palestinians and Israelis is notable. How do you approach fostering dialogue and understanding in such a complex and often polarized space?
Rabbi Rebecca Keren Jablonski: With any challenge, I turn to scripture and commandments to work my way through. The Old Testament instructs us to “love thy neighbor” (Leviticus 19:18). By the way, the world’s most famous former Rabbi, Jesus, preached and taught the same to his followers. In general, Judaism’s texts promote a loving relationship with G-d, his people, and all peoples. Israelis and Palestinians are neighbors and human beings, each deserving of dignity and love. When I come back to this basic principle, I see the need for positive interactions that can lead to positive relationships and business partnerships between Palestinians and Israelis.
Both peoples depend on agriculture, live in the same region, and hold similar concerns. Both peoples harvest produce and sell to their markets. Building Together introduced the two communities so they can share best practices and co-design identical facilities to streamline their profits. Building Together raises money to reward willing Israeli and Palestinian communities with all-expenses-paid factories to create a co-owned and co-branded product: date honey. This honey is sold in the USA, mostly at faith institutions and universities. The profits are split between the two communities and improve quality of life on both sides. As more and more communities will see the upside of working together, this process will expand to more and more communities. By being an intermediary and doing the work to find peaceful and willing parties from Palestinian and Israeli populations, Building Together is trying to really affect change in the Middle East. Truly the majority of Palestinians and Israelis are moderate and want the best for each other. We help facilitate a practical effort.
Building Together’s board is equal parts Christian, Jewish, and Muslim. All members are dedicated to making the lives better for the inhabitants of Israel and Palestine. Often even board members do not interpret current events in the same way. We are not a political organization but see we both recognize our fortune and possibility to help. No matter what, we are neighbors and behave neighborly. We hold space for each other’s experiences and try to have productive dialogue. Sometimes we agree to pause when we realize we are going down a path with no resolution. More often, we have much in common with our humanity. As leaders, we continue to come back to that.
Meghan Forte: With so many changes in how people connect to faith, especially among younger generations, how do you keep Judaism relevant and meaningful to the community?
Rabbi Rebecca Keren Jablonski: Firstly, I lead by example, balancing my own way of life as deeply Jewish but engaged in modern life. Then I acknowledge that each situation, family or individual in front of me is unique and has their own mishigas – idiosyncrasies that have brought them to me. Faith is personal, practice is personal and I have to get to know the person(s) I’m working with. I also identify what practices or beliefs from the vastness of Judaism would be relevant to each cohort that I facilitate for. I lean into their interests and open the door to religious thought and practice through that interest or idea. The rest takes care of itself. Judaism is interesting, fun, musical and complex. There is always a way in. Communicating with the use of technology and staying up to date on trends and pop culture the way this generation communicates is so important. I text. I dm. I have a little dog who goes everywhere with me. I’m a rabbi for this century, in this century.
Meghan Forte: How does your background in the arts from NYU influence your approach to teaching, officiating, and community building?
Rabbi Rebecca Keren Jablonski: Anyone in a public facing job has to have public speaking skills. My training as an actor has helped me finetune this talent. I am also a rabbi that sings and reads music. I punctuate religious events with musical elements, drawing from contemporary Jewish composers as well as ancient melodies. I have working relationships with many musicians to add to the ambiance of any ceremony. I’m also aware that while religious ceremonies generally are not scripted, they follow an order that allows for improvisation and feeding off of an audience. As a rabbi, I adjust my words based on each community I serve and their real-time feedback. I have to be funny and present – skills I honed in my craft as a performer.
Meghan Forte: What advice do you have for women aspiring to leadership roles within religious communities, particularly in spaces traditionally dominated by men?
Rabbi Rebecca Keren Jablonski: Women can do everything men can do, but not everyone wants that. Take risks, break through, inspire as you want to, and know there are going to be many parishioners interested in your offering. Still, some will not approve, and they are as free to choose as you are. Be strong and brave. Listen carefully to clues from guides above that will help you craft your practice.
Meghan Forte: Can you talk about how your work in charity and advocacy intersects with your role as a rabbi?
Rabbi Rebecca Keren Jablonski: It is a Jewish command to engage in acts of justice and charity. Not only rabbis must fulfill that command. But as a rabbi, I must lead by example. I have found causes that match my values like supporting veterans, cooking for the food insecure, Israel advocacy, and Building relationships between Israelis and Palestinians through farming. My husband and I are members of various arts organizations and museums and donate to most fundraisers that are important to our network of friends and family. Donating or doing acts of charity during significant milestones is a way that my husband and I celebrate as well. We had a charity project in honor of our wedding and often mix our birthday celebrations with causes for which we care.
As a rabbi, the people I serve come to me for recommendations for charities to involve themselves with. Their unique interests and causes keep me learning about more organizations and ways to help the greater world. Whether it’s with volunteering or fundraising, we all have something to give and there are many worthy organizations to join. Sometimes people need creative ideas to get started and I help people figure it out.
Meghan Forte: How has your personal life, including your relationship with your husband, Ben, and your dog, Scout, shaped your perspective as a rabbi and educator?
Rabbi Rebecca Keren Jablonski: Every rabbi I know has an all-encompassing job with very little time for personal socializing. My dog, Scout, comes with me to nearly all my appointments in a week, whether I’m teaching, meeting, studying or making an appearance for one of my literary projects. I have such long days, I bring frozen dog food with me that thaws over the course of my day and he eats his dinner on the go.
In general, because being a rabbi is my life, I share my life and am vulnerable with the families I serve. They make me cry and I make them cry. They know my hopes and feelings. Because I share my struggles and joys with them, they can do the same with me. Traditional clergy usually maintain distance to keep a feeling of authority and gravitas in their communities. I lead with openness and informality. It is my experience that this approach creates a warmer and more spiritual environment for all.
My husband is an entrepreneur and leads a very busy life, as well. Frequently, evenings out with my husband are charitable events or one of my clients’ lifecycle events. We both enjoy a chance to dress up for a celebration, though are equally happy watching the news or a tv-series on the couch late at night. Because Ben believes what I do is important and I feel similarly about his work, we are understanding of the demands on our time. I’m extremely lucky that Ben loves Scout and is also amenable to Scout accompanying us on every vacation – including our mini-moon (at Sanctuary at Camelback Mountain in Scottsdale, AZ).
As a young rabbi who maintains a busy practice, I had very little time to dedicate to travel and relationships. Now that I’m married, I hope that, with the urging of my husband, I find space for a more balanced life.
Amid the realities of our ever-changing world, Rabbi Rebecca Keren Jablonski’s journey epitomizes the importance of following one’s heart and intuition on a deeply personal and spiritual path. By sharing her story, she emphasizes the significance of faith, grit, and openness to change.
In addition to her role as a rabbi, Rabbi Rebecca Keren Jablonski is a private educator, performer, author, and entrepreneur. She understands the many hats a rabbi wears, serving individuals from various walks of life both within her temple and in the broader community. For the younger readers, Rabbi Jablonski is also the author of a children’s book titled Dinotsaurus.
Thank you, Rabbi Rebecca Keren Jablonski, for shaping the lives of the next generation with your spiritual teachings and serving others with kindness. We appreciate your willingness to share an intimate glimpse into your journey.
Services available through Rabbi Rebecca Keren Jablonski’s website include Judaic Studies and Hebrew Education, ceremony officiation, tutoring in the faith (including conversion tutoring), and the creation of individualized prayer books for Bar or Bat Mitzvahs, weddings, or family events, incorporating personal touches.
Jablonski is an alumnus of the Charles E. Smith Jewish Day School, New York University’s Tisch School of the Arts, and received semicha (rabbinic ordination) from the yeshiva Mesifta Adath Wolkowisk in New York.
Jablonski’s most recent book, the memoir, Confessions of a Female Rabbi: Relevant Religion in an On-Demand World, is a compelling read that should not be overlooked.
Professional Website
Contact Form to Rabbi Rebecca Keren Jablonski
Read: Confessions of a Female Rabbi: Relevant Religion in an On-Demand World, available on Amazon
Barnes and Noble Link for Confessions of a Female Rabbi: Relevant Religion in an On-Demand World
Website for the children’s book Dinotsaurus
Listen to the podcast, Shalom in Your Phone , available on Spotify
Rabbi Rebecca Keren Jablonski’s Instagram Profile Tik TokProfile
